Pronouncing Balm

Ryan,

Then you can spell them "baalm", "paalm" and "caalm" if you like.

But I'd get marked wrong if I ever took a test at a university outside of my home state... and vice versa for outsiders coming into my state.

Not if I were the emperor of the world. If I were emperor, everyone would be allowed to spell according to their accent. And let's face it, unless I become emperor, my spelling reform is going nowhere.