How to politely ask 'Where are you from?'

Damian in Edinburgh   Mon Aug 04, 2008 7:08 am GMT
I wonder if the British doctor who treated Uriel in England presented her with a bill for her treatment seing that she is not a UK resident......just asking. ;-) Our NHS (National Health Service) is taken advantage of big time by people from overseas in that treatment is given and not charged for when by rights it should be for non UK citizens (the fault of the authorities that's true...regulations neeed tightening up) but when it comes to emergency treatment - usually in A & E (Accident and Emergency departments - all treatment is universally free at the point of issue no matter where the patient comes from, which to most of us Brits is more than just a wee bit of a sort point, if you pardon the expression. We could save gazillions of the readies in the British NHS if we charged ALL non resident foreigners for health treatment, even if it's merely for anti-biotics and a bandage! This is a hot topic here at the minute. Getting taken for a sot touch is a British pastime.

No, I have never, ever been disrespectful to any American visiting my country....that was simply my observation. Maybe they did say something in the way of "goodbye" but it's the way in which they left that seemed a bit strange. There we were having a great time in the pub chatting and laughing and all that kind of thing when the American would just suddenly get up without prior warning and say, as you said, "I gotta go, guys!" and just leave...just like that. Maybe they didn't like the beer.....

I quite like the South African accent......it's developed so much along its own lines, and is not much like the Dutch accent at all really.
Guest   Mon Aug 04, 2008 7:18 am GMT
<<when the American would just suddenly get up without prior warning and say, as you said, "I gotta go, guys!" and just leave...just like that. Maybe they didn't like the beer....>>

What is one supposed to do?
George   Mon Aug 04, 2008 8:42 am GMT
This post is a little bit off topic, but, Damien, I disagree that a free healthcare provided for non-Britons is a sore point. I could not support in more wholeheartedly. For a start, anyone who is working, foreign or otherwise, will be making contributions to the NHS via national insurance payments, and so is fully entitled to healthcare, as should all residents be. I don't actually know what the situation is if a tourist is unfortunate enough to need treatment, but if this relatively small number of people slip through the net, all the better for us and our social responsibility.

Reform within the NHS is still an important issue and while some parts are world class other areas really need work. I am, however, very proud that we have a commitment to genuinely accessible healthcare for everyone in the country.
Damian in Edinburgh   Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:16 am GMT
I agree George, but it IS abused by people who are not entitled to it. Think of the phrase "Health Tourism to the UK". It's Bank Holiday in Scotland today - don't work too hard, you guys down there in England. I'm off to the Continent, via London, later today...going through about 5 countries in all....all those Languages......well, about 4 anyway. That's enough to cope with in 6 days. Thank goodness everyone speaks English......well, most of them anyway. Cheers.
Damian in Edinburgh   Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:18 am GMT
btw George - I will be carrying my EHIC card.....European Health Insurance Card.....just in case. Oh, and my Eurorail card....THAT I cannot do without.
Guest   Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:22 am GMT
Damian, respond to this:

{{ <<when the American would just suddenly get up without prior warning and say, as you said, "I gotta go, guys!" and just leave...just like that. Maybe they didn't like the beer....>>

What is one supposed to do? }}
Damian in Edinburgh   Mon Aug 04, 2008 10:18 am GMT
***What is one supposed to do? }}***

Remember that you just can't leave because.... it happens to be YOUR round! ;-) That is one major crime in the UK - a definite no-no!
John Cowan   Mon Aug 04, 2008 7:04 pm GMT
"Never ask a man where he's from. If he's from Texas, he'll tell you; and if not, why embarrass him?" --Texas saying
American   Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:02 pm GMT
>> . There we were having a great time in the pub chatting and laughing and all that kind of thing when the American would just suddenly get up without prior warning and say, as you said, "I gotta go, guys!" and just leave...just like that. <<

Hmm. I do that all the time. Is it really that strange? If I start feeling a little bored, I just say, "Well see ya later" or "I gotta go." and then just leave. I have a friend who's really into Pokemon cards, and it's sort of boring to me, so when she starts talking about Pokemon cards, I just say: "Well, I gotta go." I can't hang around all day, and my philosophy is why waste time with boring people? Time is money.
Rene   Tue Aug 05, 2008 1:32 am GMT
I don't see anything too odd about just saying gotta go and leaving. Americans do it all the time to each other, not just to foreigners. What is the British custom? Wait until the conversation just runs out?

I can't imagine getting offended by the question of where I'm from, except that I do get annoyed when someone asks what town and then I tell them and they don't know where it is so they want a detailed description. They need to look it up on a map if they are that curious.
Guest   Tue Aug 05, 2008 5:51 am GMT
<<I don't see anything too odd about just saying gotta go and leaving. Americans do it all the time to each other, not just to foreigners. What is the British custom? Wait until the conversation just runs out? >>

Exactly, there's no point hanging around all day. When you want to go, GO! Don't feel obliged to stay for the sake of some artificial politeness. If you have something better to do, leave!
Guest   Tue Aug 05, 2008 5:55 am GMT
<<I can't imagine getting offended by the question of where I'm from, except that I do get annoyed when someone asks what town and then I tell them and they don't know where it is so they want a detailed description. They need to look it up on a map if they are that curious.>>

Nor would I, although I think it wouldn't really be a very exciting conversation to have...

P1:So where are you from?
P2: America
P1:What part of America?
P2: Illinois
P1:Where at in Illinois?
P2: Town X
P1:What's it like there?
P2: Um, like any other medium sized American town...
P1:How does it compare with here?
P2: Um, it's a bit different... But kind of the same...
P1:How?
P2: Well, there are lots of stores, like there are here.. there are some parks, kind of like here... there are a few skyscrapers, kind of like here..., the weathers a bit different, but not too much.. uhhhhhh
George W Bush   Tue Aug 05, 2008 7:50 am GMT
If this type of conversation is really so boring, there must be a lot of boring people in the world.
K. T.   Tue Aug 05, 2008 4:52 pm GMT
"I said "New Mexico", to which he paused and replied "NEW Mexico?" Well, I was in pain and not really willing to go into the Mexican-American War and the Gadsden Purchase just then"-Uriel

You should be a comedian/comedienne, Uriel. Did he really say this? Aargh! Terrible. Regrettably many physicians have time for only one interest outside of their work. Obviously he hasn't done the European tour of the Southwest. Once a Swiss gentleman with a thick accent asked me "What's Nava-JOE mean?" Wrong state, but you get the idea...

Glad you're still here.
K. T.   Tue Aug 05, 2008 5:16 pm GMT
"We could save gazillions of the readies in the British NHS if we charged ALL non resident foreigners for health treatment, even if it's merely for anti-biotics and a bandage! This is a hot topic here at the minute. Getting taken for a sot touch is a British pastime."Damian

I don't think Americans would mind paying for a bandage and I doubt they are coming in droves to take advantage of the NHS. We have pretty good healthcare here. I haven't seen any better anywhere in the world where I've travelled or worked. We also give "free care" to people in the emergency department. We also write off bills at times. You have to know how it works, to get this, but it happens.


"No, I have never, ever been disrespectful to any American visiting my country....that was simply my observation. Maybe they did say something in the way of "goodbye" but it's the way in which they left that seemed a bit strange. There we were having a great time in the pub chatting and laughing and all that kind of thing when the American would just suddenly get up without prior warning and say, as you said, "I gotta go, guys!" and just leave...just like that. Maybe they didn't like the beer....."

I understand this as an American, but I wonder if you were hoping for a different type of closure. "Whoa! Look at the time. I've got to get back to the hotel/hostel/home before I get locked out/yelled at/fake excuse. Thanks for the beer and ..." Is this more of the casual convention? Something different?

There is also "I gotta go, guys" that Americans use when the conversation takes an unwanted/unexpected turn. "Ookay. Gotta go, guys!"

Your viewpoint is always interesting, Damian.