is it...or....or...?

Is it " I haven't seen em in 3 months" or " I haven't seen him for 3 months" or both?

Both are fine and have basically the same meaning.

They're not the same:

"I haven't seen 'em in 3 months": 'em (note the apostrophe) = them
"I haven't seen him in 3 months": him = him

If you're going to write down colloquial speech, then use 'im for "him".

thnx guys.
BTW, when writing down "colloquial speach", both "im" and "em" have the same pronuciation. Right?

No.

You could try using "them" instead of " 'em". See how it feels...

>BTW, when writing down "colloquial speach", both "im"
>and "em" have the same pronuciation. Right?

As Random Chappie stated, no. Only in parts of the American South do they have the same pronunciation, but, when written, "'im" is always "him" and "'em" is always "them".

Actually, after thinking about it, they *could* perhaps have the same pronunciation if they were unstressed and in rapid speech (a sort of "um" sound) in other areas of the English-speaking world, but they would still be written as "'im" and "'em". I'm not too certain of this theory, though -- confirmations, anyone?

Yeah, that sounds about right , Ailian. They'd be distinct in careful speech but in careful speech the words wouldn't unsually be shortened in this way.

I'm not into the way it's written. My question is about whether or whether not they're pronuced the same as in " I told em" and " I told im". I think both have the same pronuciation "um".

No I don't, but I imagine some people would pronounce them both 'm.

I say:
I told em ~ I told 'm (the ' is a schwa)
I told him ~ I told im

The faster I speak, the closer both come to 'm.

Personally, I have always pronounced 'im (which I say very often) the way it is written- that is, with the "i" sound in "little".

I say um the same.
If I were speaking slowly enough to make a distinction between the vowel 'e' and the vowel 'i', I would be speaking slowly enough to put in the 'th' or the 'h' as well.

If I heard "Give um hell!", I would need to look around for context to see if um was him or them.

(For the record, I would write 'im or 'em.)